Keep the faith

Keep the faith Wordle © K. Hall

When our children are babies, we are just so excited for that day when they can actually talk. That first spoken word: “mama”, “dada”, or even “no”,  just brings us so much joy!

Fast forward a few short years, and for the first time, we hear our beloved toddler repeat our words. Not necessarily the good ones. We wince, embarrassed for ourselves and our child. Yikes! Who knew they were actually listening?

Fast forward to the teen years, and many of us would prefer often times to have silence as opposed to the sometimes crabby or mumbled language that passes for conversation with our kids.

We wonder if they are paying attention to all the lessons we teach. We wonder if they are watching the respectful manner with which we treat others. We wonder if they are getting the message of anything good at all, and we despair sometimes at feeling successful as parents.

And then, it happens.

It’s sort of like those toddler moments, because they are repeating what they have heard from us, only this time in an absolutely delightful way.

They might comfort a friend using kind words that mimic ours, stand up for themselves using assertive phrases they learned from us, or use empowering language that you had no idea they knew how to use.

For instance, this morning our daughter (who hated school, by the way), was regaling me with a story of a playful conversational exchange she held with a older coworker who is a voracious reader, and her portion went something like this:

I am being enervated by the listlessly loquacious today, and find myself in a perpetual state of ennui.

Who knew she knew such wonderfully descriptive language, and where is my dictionary so I can be sure of what she said?

Keep the faith. I know I keep saying that, and some of you are so deep into the very difficult times that you can’t imagine having a conversation with your teen, let alone an enjoyable chat with them, not at them. They do hear you. They do listen. And watch. And they test, always checking the boundaries. Just continue to be there with them and for them, and your faith and efforts will pay off handsomely.

What language are you choosing to use today?